


Of Pink Lemonade and Relocated Souls

by Diary



Series: Stolen Bone [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angels, Awkwardness, Bechdel Test Pass, Brothers, Families of Choice, Friendship/Love, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Late Night Conversations, POV Multiple, Post-Season/Series 05 AU, Soulless Sam Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-15
Updated: 2017-06-15
Packaged: 2018-11-14 07:16:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11203086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Diary/pseuds/Diary
Summary: Reposted under different title. AU. “Bobby Singer made my lemonade pink.” Complete.





	Of Pink Lemonade and Relocated Souls

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Supernatural.

External forces can only heal souls to a certain extent.

When Castiel opens the box containing Sam Winchester’s soul in Heaven, he does what he can. He has Rachel separate the memories from the soul and lock them in the box, and he guides Sam’s soul into Sam’s heaven.

In properly designed heavens, there is an inescapable feeling of love woven into the air. Forgiveness is unheard of, for the love tells them they have never done anything to put them in need of it.

However, some part of Sam’s will is stronger than even the designed heaven.

Sam is happy, safe, and content, but it’s evident in the way those inhabiting his heaven often coax him into taking medicine, he’s not healed. Some part of him is struggling and grasping for something.

He orders his trusted allies to immediately alert him if something drastically changes with Sam.

…

Dean sets his drink down. “A kid? Really, Bessie?”

Rolling her eyes, Bessandra flips Dean upside down. “This child has a math test. She despises math. Also, there is a provocative boy who is bragging about getting movie tickets that she can’t afford.”

“Oh, okay,” he says. Sam helps him flip right side up and pulls him back down until his feet touch the ground. “And what are you going to do when her parents, teachers, and friends are worried sick about her randomly disappearing?”

“She and her mother will argue, her teachers won’t care, and she has no friends.”

“Okay,” Sam says. “Whatever. We didn’t summon you here to talk about your choice in vessels.”

“I know why you summoned me.”

“And?”

“Perhaps, Raphael is not the best choice. However, I will declare myself and my supporters neutral rather than stand with you and Castiel.”

Dean sighs. “You don’t have your brother’s dedication, Bessie.”

“My name is Bessandra, and I have a dedication to never intentionally helping the likes of you.”

“Oh, but we’re so adorable.”

“As you have said in the past,” is her icy response. “Now, if you do not kill me, I will tear this house down in an effort to allow the rain to wipe away this circle of fire.”

“Here, the deal,” Sam says. He holds up a bucket of water. “You tell us why you’ll never help us, and we’ll put it out ourselves.”

“I should trust the words of a soulless creature?”

“I’ve never lied to you,” Dean points out. He picks up his drink. “How ‘bout, you talk to us, we let you go, and we even throw in some cookies or soda for the kid?”

“She is not to have soda. However, those mixtures of chocolate and buttered peanuts would be acceptable.”

“It’s peanut butter,” Sam says.

“Your language is a strange one,” she retorts. 

She looks at Dean. He brings the glass down. “You have hurt women and children. You have hurt what humans call ‘homosexuals’. You have hurt those whose souls were somehow placed in bodies they were not meant to inhabit. Perhaps, if you felt true- what is the word? Perhaps, if you truly intended to atone, it would be one thing. However, you don’t. You don’t even particularly care about the war in Heaven. Castiel is your reason for doing this.”

“Is that a bad thing? Him loving Cas?”

He moves before Dean’s fist can make contact.

“Castiel was part of the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah.”

“Does that mean you condone rape, Bessandra? Those men wanted to harm angels of the lord. They wanted to harm the vessels they inhabited,” Sam replies

“I do not condone the death of innocents to make a point. I couldn’t care less about those would-be rapists, but there were infants, children, the powerless elderly, and innocent men and women of the cities. Of course, that poor woman looked back, unable to flee, knowing those poor souls, some of whom she loved, were suffering. It should have been that despicable Lot, who was coldly able to leave them and who offered the ones he should have been willing to give his life to protect, for such horrible violation.”

“I’m not disagreeing,” Dean says. “Look, Cas is trying to make things right.”

“No. He doesn’t know what the right thing is.”

“Oh, yeah? What is the right thing?”

“Paradise,” she answers. “Not free will. Everyone, even those I cannot personally love, are deserving of unconditional love. Everyone, even those I wish the opposite on, are deserving of happiness. God wanted humans to Fall, and so, they did. He wanted Lucifer to rebel, and so, Lucifer did. I’m not stupid, and I’m not brave. If God ever comes back, I am likely to be forever killed or forever tortured for what I’m doing. Yet, I _do_ have dedication, just as Uriel did, and I will fight to correct what ought not to have ever been done.”

Wordlessly, Dean sets the glass down and starts to put the fire out, but Sam reaches over to stop him.

“I’m soulless. I can’t love. What I can do is figure people out, most of the time. People fall in love with flaws and virtues, both. Love is sometimes selfish. Last time, you were so earnest when you talked about how beautiful and delicate it was to match up two people and watch them experience happiness and sadness, pain and contentment, as they figured out how to truly bind themselves together.”

“This argument continually vexes me,” she responds. “Angels fall in love. Those souls in Heaven are not without personality. Free will is not what gives a person preferences, virtues, and flaws. It gives pain and the ability to do horrible things. In paradise, people will still have likes and dislikes, and they will still love and be loved. There will simply be no tragedy.”

“You’re wrong,” Dean declares.

“Only time will tell. Nevertheless, even if no more children will ever be born, all I’m willing to do is stand to the side. Yours is not the side I will ever willingly stand behind.”

…

Coming into the kitchen, Bobby finds a strange looking kid, and his gut tells him she isn’t human. Gripping his knife, he demands, “Who are you?”

“Bessandra,” she answers. “Your sons trapped me in holy fire. They released me before I destroyed your house.”

Sam appears with a bag of Reese peanut butter cups. “Sorry, Bobby. Dean promised her candy. No soda.”

“He is most unkind to many who have bodies such as my vessel’s.”

Shrugging, Sam says, “He’s trying to save the world.” He pours her a glass of water. “Besides, no, actually, he’s not. He might make comments when they can’t hear him, but he doesn’t say it to them or to anyone who will repeat it to them.”

“That does not make it better.”

“Right,” Bobby says. He lets the knife fall in his pocket. Part of him is tempted to walk away, but since the boys never had to settle for water when they visited, something compels him to ask, “Would you or your vessel or whatever like some lemonade?”

“Is it pink?”

“It can be,” Bobby answers. “If you want.”

…

“Is all well, Samandriel,” Rachel asks.

Smiling, he answers, “Yes. I quite like the younger Winchester.”

“Good.” She starts to leave.

“Rachel. Are you well? I heard Bessandra approached you. With Castiel’s orders not to engage her unless provoked, I have to ask: Did she harm you?”

“No,” she assures him. “She was peaceful in her intent. She merely wished to know if there was a possibility of Castiel and me binding.”

“I hope this war will be over soon,” he says. “I worry I may not be able to forever protect the souls. It’s nice to know that, whatever disagreements she and Castiel have, they both share my concern. I wish it were the same for Raphael.”

“Fear not,” she tells him. “Though you don’t fight with Castiel, as long as you stay true to your duty, I will gladly lay down my life for yours.”

“Thank you, sister. I wish you happiness.”

“The same to you, brother. Now, I must return.”

…

At one point, Sam Winchester closes his eyes.

When he opens them, he sees himself playing catch with his daughter. Nearby, Bobby and his dad argue, Dean and Cas are talking to his mom, and Jess is playing with Sarah’s baby.

“Heaven,” he says.

There’s no answer, but he feels a presence anyways.

“Hey. Cas, if that’s you, the real you, could you please talk to me? Or at least, let me hug you.”

“Dean- is coping,” Cas says.

He looks over, and Cas twists his body awkwardly. “It could be better, but-”

Sam firmly hugs him. “Cas, it’s so good to see you. Are you dead, or-”

“I was resurrected after you jumped,” Cas informs him. “I brought Bobby back.”

“Thank you,” Sam breathes. Letting go, he steps back and smiles. “So, uh, how long have I been here? Did- did you do this, or did someone else decide to bring me here?”

“Sam, there’s a lot you don’t know, some of which you may find upsetting.”

“Tell me, anyways.”

…

“Hello, boys.”

Sam  glances over at Dean.

Three months ago, Dean and Bobby had big argument, and since then, Dean hasn’t been as destructive –he’s stopped drinking as much, and he’s stopped being quite so obvious about his death wish- but he’s still destructive.

“Get bent, Crowley,” Dean snaps.

“Gladly, but first, we need to have a little discussion about your angel sending his angels into Hell and stealing souls. I won’t tolerate this.”

Dean scoffs. “First, I’m guessing you’re talking about Cas. Second, if, and this is a big if, he’s going on jailbreak runs or sending his lackeys  to do it, me and Samuel- well, I- don’t know anything about it.”

“I don’t know anything about it, either,” Sam says.

He feels a familiar twinge of exasperation.

Cas and Dean aren’t exactly fighting, but Dean isn’t happy Cas has been talking to Sam’s soul in heaven.

“No, really,” Crowley inquires. He looks between them closely.

“What exactly do you mean? Souls are being stolen?”

“Yes,” Crowley answers. “Someone’s been a busy little bee, slipping in, and leading souls out. I’ve had to drastically alter security, and it’s not bloody working!”

“Where are the souls going?”

“To Heaven, of course. Oh, you’d boys know if they were coming up here.”

“And no one’s noticed up there,” Dean asks.

“I wouldn’t know, would I? The darling angel is ignoring my calls, and the few angels I’ve managed to get a hold of, they all tell me no gives a damn. If Castiel is using souls to power his-”

“He’s not,” Dean says. “We talked about that and decided against it. If he’d changed his mind-”

“Oh, yes, I’m sure he’d tell you straight away. That’s always been his M.O., correct? Telling you about the angels’ plans, telling you about our brief partnership, about my supposed death, and so on.”

“Crowley, I used to think you were better than this,” Sam says. “But this is what you’ve been reduced to? Trying to drive a wedge between my brother and Cas? It won’t work. We’ll talk to Cas, but not for you. If he doesn’t know, we’ll rectify that. If he does, we’ll ask him what’s going on. He’s earned our trust.”

“Yeah,” Dean agrees. “Now, get out of here before I get the salt, Crowley.”

…

Rachel carefully withdraws a memory from the box.

“You don’t like humans very much, do you?”

“You’re important to Castiel,” she answers. “This will hurt. Brace yourself.”

“Thank you, anyway. For doing this.”

She pauses. “I’m not very- intelligent. I’m a talented fighter, and I’m skilled with such things as this. Surgery is the closest word for it. Castiel is a tactician, a statistician. He’s clever. More than that, he has always been what I believe God meant for us to be. There’s an angel named Naomi, and for a long time, she tried to conform Castiel. However, in the end, he’s always been so fond and protective of humanity. When it comes to you and your brother, however, it exceeds even that. You don’t need to thank me. Just show him the love and loyalty he deserves.”

Then, she carefully slides the memory into him, catches him when he falls, and unflinchingly lets him squeeze her hand.

…

“That would explain the shifts I’ve felt,” Cas muses. “Thank you for telling me about this.”

“You didn’t think to tell us about these shifts?”

Tilting his head, Cas is quiet for a moment. “No. Dean, I promise, I’m not in any way trying to deceive you. Heaven hasn’t felt right in a very long time. I’d assumed these shifts were another part of that. They didn’t concern me.”

“Right. How’s Sam?”

“I assume you mean the one in Heaven. On his request, Rachel is slowly integrating his memories of hell back into him.”

“Is that even safe?”

“I don’t know,” Cas admits. “However, I’ve made it clear, if he can’t handle it, I’ll refuse to let it continue. He doesn’t appreciate that.”

“Yeah,” Dean says. A small smile appears. “He wouldn’t.”

The smile fades.

“What are you feeling?”

“I have no idea. Anyway, if this has nothing to do with you, and I’m assuming it has nothing to do with Raphael, who’s going- Wait, I know when you brought me back, at first, my memory wasn’t all there. It did come back, though, and it wasn’t good. Say someone’s doing like what you did for me and Sammy. Who could do that?”

“I’m not sure. Rachel’s the best of the best in that regard, but I don’t believe it’s her. However, I will ask.”

“Thanks, Cas.”

…

“No, Castiel,” Rachel answers. “You know how I feel about the damned.”

“I wish you could understand,” he says. “This is not what God would want.”

“I understand this is not what you want.”

He sighs. “Rachel- I am not- What I mean is that: Who and what you perceive me to be, I am not that angel, that leader. I should have told you this a long time ago, but- There is no ‘but’, I simply didn’t. However, it may come out soon, anyways. There was a time when I was working with Crowley. I planned to use the souls found in Purgatory.”

“I know,” Rachel says.

He looks over in surprise.  

“I heard the rumours. I had planned to confront you. However, the soulless abomination summoned me and showed me proof you had abandoned those plans. In the end, you always do the right thing, Castiel. That is why God has chosen you.”

“I have so many doubts.”

“You’ve told me. Yet, through it all, you try to do the right thing. And when you are wrong, you try to fix things.”

“What would you have done if you had confronted me and I refused to stand down?”

She looks away. “What I had to. You’ve always been the stronger fighter. Perhaps, you would have won. If I managed to get the upper hand, however, I wouldn’t have hesitated.”

Nodding, he leans over to kiss her cheek. “When this war is over, one of the things I hope for most is for you to find happiness, Rachel.”

…

“Dean.”

“Look, Bobby, I’m trying okay? I’m trying. I hate- the thing wearing my brother’s body, speaking with Sammy’s voice, I hate him. But he and I get the job done. Cas says things are going better in heaven. Maybe, he’ll win his war soon, and he can spend more time down here. You know, last night, we got in a two-hour debate about abortion? Since when do I give a crap about things like that? Still, it was nice. He makes a lot of things more interesting than I ever thought they could be.”

“So, is this about you not being sure how to handle being in love with him, or is this about you being in love with him being the only thing holding you together?”

“Bobby, don’t,” he orders. “Don’t. I’m the heartbreaker, not him.”

“Oh, please. You made one little girl cry, you cheated on one girl, and you and Lisa didn’t work out. Well, guess what. Little boys usually make little girls cry, how a person handles a relationship as a teenager isn’t always how they’ll handle things when they’ve grown up and realised how stupid they were, and you tried with Lisa. Sometimes, things just don’t work. She told you to leave, and because you love her and that boy of hers, you did. You made sure you wouldn’t continue hurting them.”

“Man up, son,” he orders. “If you aren’t ready to put yourself out there, you aren’t ready. But don’t hide behind excuses.”

“Excuses?”

“You heard me. You-”

Dean’s cell phone rings, and he sighs. “Hello.”

“Is this one of the Winchesters,” a vaguely familiar voice demands.

“Depends. Who’s calling?”

“Bobby Singer made my lemonade pink.”

“Bessie?”

“Not exactly. It’s about time I got one of you! I only remembered a few numbers from her, so, basically, I’ve calling every number I can possibly think of, which sucks, because I’m terrible at numbers, and my mom’s probably going to kill me for all the long distance calls I’ve made, never mind all the strange messages I’ve been leaving. The police might come arrest me for prank calls! But that’s not important. I think Bessie’s in trouble. Or I know she is, but it’s complicated,” the voice babbles out.

“Uh, okay, slow down. Bessie’s in trouble?”

“Yes,” she insists. “I don’t really know anything, but three days ago, I woke up from a terrible dream. Either she tried to get inside me, or she did but had to leave. I’ve tried summoning her, and I keep getting nosebleeds and jiggly legs, which has never happened. I summoned some other angels, who are all pissed at me, and none of them knows where she is. They don’t even care. And I know you and your brother aren’t exactly her friends, but um, please, tell me you care.”

He groans. “Okay, sweetheart, where are you? Better yet, let’s start even simpler: What’s your name?”

…

“There’s something odd about the strange-haired child.”

“I can hear you,” Charlene Odin declares. “And I know angels don’t have races, but you’re in a white body.”

“You are not what other humans consider white?”

“My dad wasn’t white,” she answers. “I got my hair and eyes from him. Everything else, I got from mom’s grandmother. They burned her at the stake because she was too weird looking. Literally. They thought she must have been a witch or a changeling or something.”

“I think Cas was talking more about the hair curlers than anything,” Sam suggests.  “And what was your great-grandmother’s name?”

“Blame Tommy Turner for that. He made a dare that I wouldn’t wear these in public for a week. Stupid dare, if you ask me. I’m so getting those movie tickets. Not that it’ll do me much good, with my mom probably locking me in my room without my computer or DVR until I’m thirty, but still. Uh, her name was Ida Franklin O’Hara. Um, I think. I might have mixed up the order of those last two.”

“Has anything changed for you since Bessandra tried to manifest,” Cas asks.

“I don’t know.”

“Have you been able to eat?”

“No. I tried, and I threw up. I’ve been too busy trying to find y’all to try again.”

“What about drinking and-”

Dean walks in. “Bobby finally caught a demon that might know something. He claims that Bessie’s being held prisoner by Crowley.”

“Why would Crowley care about Bessandra,” Cas wonders. “Raphael is not sentimental. He will leave her for dead before he’ll compromise his mission.”

“The cupids won’t,” Charlene interjects. “Sorry, I don’t know what they’re called up there. Bessie told me Crowley doesn’t like them. Since they’ve been doing what they used to do, they’ve been making life a lot harder for him and the demons who make deals. But those angels I talked to, they all told me to talk to someone who cared. Well, I think, ‘Summon us again, you strange child, and we will smite you,’ translates into that. Finally, I asked who did give a damn, and they told me to try the cupids. Only, they didn’t tell me how to get one of them. That’s when you finally answered,” she tells Dean.

“The strange- This child is right.”

“Bessie doesn’t think I’m strange,” she mutters.

“Yes, well, many think that Bessandra herself is strange.”

“Cas, not helping,” Sam says.

“My apologies.”

…

“Castiel,” Samandriel greets.

“Samandriel, I have reason to believe Bessandra has been captured by Crowley.”

Turning, Samandriel says, “I mourn for her. I must tell Inias at once.”

Reaching out, Castiel grabs him. “Samandriel, this isn’t about the war. Give me a reason to help. Please.”

“There is no reason, Castiel. She’s been bringing souls from Perdition, to help Raphael. If you had respect or affection for her, I beseech you not to harm Inias. He didn’t aid and abet her, but of course, he knew. Everyone knows- She was never strange to him.”

“You believe she’s already dead.”

…

“Alright, kid’s sleeping in the panic room,” Dean says. “Best way to break into hell?”

“Question,” Sam says. “Why are we doing this? Don’t give me lectures about humanity and compassion and all that. This is beyond dangerous, and I don’t see the payoff. Will this suddenly get her on our side?”

“You’re welcome to sit this out,” Dean says. “Bessie is a pain in the ass, and knowing our luck, this will probably come back to bite us, hard. But she cares so much- and now, I have this kid begging for someone, anyone, to care. Because, she knows she can’t do anything but ask. She’s not a hunter or a witch or even an adult. She’s just this outcast kid who can’t even drive and thinks that Bobby making lemonade pink is legitimately cool. So, I’m going to try to help her.”

“No, I’m in,” Sam says. “Our best bet is probably to find a reaper with loose ethics. One of us goes in, the other stays with the reaper; if Crowley finds out, the reaper will be his number one target. Now, would calling Tessa be a good or bad idea?”

“Thanks,” Dean says.

“Hey, I’m not afraid of dying. And if you say something’s important, I’ll listen.”

…

In the panic room, Charlene jolts awake.

“No,” Bessandra says. “Not yet, little one.”

She produces a knife. “I’m sorry for this.”

…

Shivering, Rachel demands, “Why have you summoned me?” She looks around the room and at the knife Bessandra is holding. “Angel wards. Why?”

“Because your commander cannot know about this, just yet,” Bessandra answers. “Listen to me, Rachel. This goes beyond Raphael and Castiel. There’s a greater enemy. One none of us have noticed. It’s too late for me, now, but it’s not for the rest of Heaven.”

“Crowley? Of course, he’s a concern-”

“No,” Bessandra interrupts. “It’s not a demon. Naomi. Do you recognise the name?”

“Yes. She was the supervisor of Castiel’s old garrison and the one who gave Anna’s grace to your brother.”

“I had no qualm with Anna. She was worthy of respect.” Taking a shuddering breath and causing Charlene’s body to sway, she says, “I was one of the destroyers of Sodom and Gomorrah. Instead of painting the door of every house containing male infants as I had planned, I helped slaughter them. I killed two cherubs. Naomi controlled me. She has controlled many of us, including Castiel. I don’t know if her goal is that of Raphael’s, or if he, too, is a pawn. She can control anyone, including archangels, though, you are lucky to have never been one of her victims. I don’t know what her goal is, but it- I’m starting to understand why free will is so important.”

“Let me get him.”

“No. You must warn him. You must protect him and his hunter from her. And you must help me do one last thing.”

“You’re asking for much trust on both sides, sister.”

“I’m asking you to help save this vessel’s life.”

“Let me take you to safety, Bessandra. By my wings, I swear I will not harm you.”

“I can’t. I will forever be at risk of being compromised. There’s only one way. However, I need a vessel to do it. This child is seventeen. Her father is dead, and she is her mother’s world.”

“No,” Rachel exclaims.

“Please, Rachel. We are all God’s creation. We are both angels. We must make hard decisions. I am asking you to help save this child, but if you do not, I am willing to let her die.”

“Castiel-”

“Foolish girl, you were willing to kill him, once. Regain that strength. You are alone. You must start relying on yourself. It’s Heaven’s only hope. I wish I had realised that sooner.”

“Okay,” Rachel agrees.

She steels herself.

“Thank you, sister,” Bessandra says. She eases herself to the ground. “The angel wards should protect the humans. Charlene, as inadequate as it is, I am sorry for this.”

Kneeling down, Rachel takes her hand. “She’s asleep. If this doesn’t work-”

“You will have tried.” Taking a deep breath, Bessandra brings the knife to her heart. “Thank you, Rachel.” Taking another breath, she says, “God is my creator, the only judge of all mine sins, and I die as a faithful servant as I’m able.”

…

“Okay, so, we meet this cab driver-”

They both jump at the sound emitting from the panic room.

Cas appears. “Dean. What angel do you have in the panic room? Why have you trapped them?”

“Wha- Angel? Cas,” Dean says while Cas grabs Sam to prevent him from going to the room, “all we have in there is Charlene. Unless she did it, there’s no angel wards.”

“Stay here,” Cas orders. Letting go of Sam, he disappears.

They rush to the panic room.

His palm emitting an increasing white glow, Cas orders, “Cover your eyes.”

They do until the light recedes and Cas utters a small, “No.”

On the ground, the body of Charlene lays unmoving. Black wings spread are across the floor, a blood-covered knife is near her, and Rachel is kneeling over her with a hand on the body’s cheek. Cas touches Sam’s, and once he’s gone, Cas catches Dean by the arm. “Dean. No.”

“What in the hell,” Dean spits. “Your lieutenant just killed a-”

“No, she didn’t. Look at the stab wound. This was Bessandra’s doing. Dean, go into the room and start disrupting the angel wards. It’s the only possible hope Rachel has of saving the child.”

…

After the marks have been broken, light begins to emit from Rachel.

Dean covers his eyes.

Then, there’s a gasp. “Bessie?”

“I’m sorry,” Rachel says. “She died well.”

Dean rushes over to help Charlene up. “Hey, kid. Don’t turn around, don’t look down,” he orders. Keeping a hand under her chin, he leads her out. “Are you okay?”

…

“Naomi,” Dean repeats.

Cas sighs. “I have only a vague memory of her. Some recognise the name, but they’re- reluctant to talk about her. Dean, I’m sorry about this.”

Scoffing, Dean looks up. “This ain’t your fault, Cas. We both averted the apocalypse. We both know what’s at stake when it comes to the war in heaven. Don’t forget, it was my idea to bring Bessandra into this.”

“It was a good idea, Dean. I knew Bessandra, once. She and I had much in common. If not for this Naomi, there’s a chance she might have done what I did. Or at least, she would have helped me once I did.”

“What now?”

“Right now, I have to focus on the war, but I’m not going to forget her,” Cas tells him. “I will take her wings to Heaven and give them to the cupids. Once we win, I’m going to track this Naomi down and find out what she did to Bessandra and me. I’m going to find out whom else she has harmed and what she did to them. I’m going to find out why. And then- Then, we’ll see.”

“I’ll be there, okay?” He puts his hand on Cas’s shoulder. “Just, in the meantime, don’t hop on any cloud if a lady offers you any angel food. Or do angels secretly like devil food?”

Tilting his head, Cas answers, “Angels do not eat in Heaven. I’ll be careful and try not to let anyone gain control of me.”

“Good,” Dean says. “Well, don’t worry about Charlene. Bobby and Sam have things mostly sorted out.”

…

Samandriel finds Rachel sitting quietly with her wings tucked around her. “I’m sorry.”

“Will you kill me?”

“No,” he answers. “I’m going to help you and Castiel.”

“Why?”

“I have so many different reasons,” he answers. “Because, Inias is a dear friend. Because, Bessandra has brought me even more souls to protect. They’re beautiful, you know. They’re so full of pain and so scared, even with their memories safely tucked away, but each day, they get a little bit stronger. Each day, they come closer to believing they are worthy of love and happiness. Someday, I hope all will be here, whole and happy, but I think I was meant to watch much more than I currently have. Perhaps, one day, those with free will can create paradise without controlling others, without civil wars, and without dead angels.”

“He’ll be grateful,” Rachel says.

“Whatever you feel, remember, my friend, that you did save an important person today. Someday, Bessandra’s vessel might do great things. And even if she doesn’t, Bessandra would be happy to know she’s not responsible for an innocent soul’s loss.”

…

“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong, today?”

“This is your last memory. It could take years in human time for you to recover.”

“That’s fine,” he says. “Hopefully, I’m ready. If I’m not, thank you, anyways. I hope things are better for you, soon.”

…

“Sam.”

“Hey, Castiel.” Sam looks over. “You look very conflicted.”

“You -the you I call my friend- has asked me not to talk to your brother about something.”

“Okay.” He closes his laptop. “What does me in heaven want to keep from Dean?”

“I’m going to sit down,” Cas announces.

…

“Dean.”

“Hey, Cas,” Dean greets. “Is something wrong?”

“I hope not. Sam is busy. I need you to come with me.”

“Alright.” Standing up, he gets his jacket. “What’s the word?”

“I’ll explain in the car.”

…

Looking up from his pie, Dean prods, “Come on, Cas. Something’s eating you, and it’s not some crazy nuns performing ritualistic sacrifice. Did something happen in heaven?”

“Dean, I need advice on Rachel.”

“That pretty little lieutenant of yours with the stick up her ass?”

“Rachel is someone I’m proud to having serving the cause.”

Shrugging, Dean says, “Yeah, well, unless you’re ready to lose your virginity, I don’t see how I can help you.”

“It’s been suggested she and I bind ourselves to one another, an act akin to marriage. Obviously, consummation would be a part of that, but that is not the part I require advice on.”

Dean chokes. “Okay.” Rubbing his throat, he looks at his watch. “This counts as special circumstances. I’m ordering a drink, maybe more, and you can drive.”

Once his beer comes, he downs most of it. “Uh, okay. Marriage. Well, screw everyone else, how do the two of you feel about this?”

“I haven’t discussed the matter with her, yet.”

“That would be the first thing you want to do. So. What in the hell brought this on?”

“Several people have suggested it would be strategic. I’ve had many friends, Dean, but the truth is, I’ve had few I’ve been close to. I don’t wish to make you uncomfortable, but you might be the one I’m closest to out of everyone I know.”

“Thanks, Cas,” he says. “But what does that have to do with, uh, you marrying Rachel?”

“If I show I can form deep bonds with other angels, that I’m capable of commitment and loyalty to them, I could potentially sway more to my side.”

Dean scoffs. “Okay, Cas. Let me ask you something. Forget that you tend to love most angels. Do you even like Rachel on a personal level, let alone love her, let alone are in love with her? The thing is, I think, even you realise, on some level, that she has a big ole crush on you.”

“Now, I’m not marriage material. Mom and Dad, they only had a perfect marriage after she died. If Rachel is okay being in a marriage like that, I’ll try to support you. Otherwise, though, there has to be a line, and marrying some zealous lieutenant of yours is so beyond crossing it that- just no, Cas.”

“I’m aware she harbours an attraction to me.”

“And,” Dean prods.

“I believe it would be better for both of us if she didn’t. Don’t misunderstand my words, but the first time I felt a real, genuine desire for anyone was when I held a human infant in my arms. I wanted to watch the child grow. To see them smile and laugh and cry. That was thousands of years ago. There have been other humans since then.”

“Uriel, for all the bad he did, was my friend. He could make me laugh, and he had a charisma to him that drew me in. I think, in some ways, I was a substitute for Bessandra. I’ve never minded.”

Dean takes this in. “What about sex? Have you ever felt that kind of desire?”

“Yes,” Cas answers. “It’s not of import.”

“Really. Do-”

“Dean,” he warns.

“Fine.” Dean puts his hands up. “Cas, please, tell me you’re not actually considering this.”

“I don’t wish to hurt anyone. Would this hurt you?”

“I’m not the one you’d be marrying for strategy,” Dean points out. “Do angels have divorce?”

“The answer is complex.”

“Try to uncomplex it for me.”

“The answer used to be no. The only way to break the binding was for one or both parties to die. There was a civil war, one that I was not in Heaven for, that changed that. More than two angels can do such a thing, now, and the bound can be broken without death. However, I’ve heard it’s extremely painful, and those who have done it have been banished.”

“What happens if you fall in love, Cas? What happens if you find someone, and you want to- bind yourself to them but she and Rachel don’t take kindly to it?”

“I used to think my duty was more important than anything. You taught me differently. You taught me it’s sometimes necessary to be selfish and put other things in front of it. I know undergoing binding with Rachel would be wrong, Dean. Regardless, I needed to talk to you about it.”

“Were you hoping I’d talk you out of it, or into it?”

“I would have been greatly surprised if you’d attempted the latter.”

Dean smiles. “I’m glad you- it’s okay to need to talk, even when you already know the answer, Cas.”

…

“I’m going to go check Samuel’s room. He hasn’t called, and he hasn’t been answering his phone.”

“Rachel is observing him,” Cas says. “She’ll protect him, if need be.”

Dean collapses on his bed. “Why is your lieutenant watching my soulless brother?”

“You could ask her, later, if you wished.”

“Nope, I’m going to sleep.”

…

In the morning, Dean says, “Alright, this is getting worrying. Cas, I need you to check in on Rachel. Samuel wouldn’t ignore my calls for this long unless there was something major.”

Without looking at him, Cas says, “Dean. Dean, there-”

The door bursts open, and suddenly, Sam is tightly hugging Dean.

“Wa- Wha-” Dean manoeuvres himself out and grabs a nearby knife. “What in the hell-”

“Dean.” Sam holds his hands up. “Hey, it’s me. I’m back.”

“You’ve only been gone for-” Catching Sam’s eyes, he pauses. “S-Sammy?”

“Yeah,” Sam answers with a teary laugh. “Yeah, it’s me, Dean.”

Dropping the knife, Dean pulls Sam into a fierce hug.

…

Struggling against Cas, Bobby practically yells, “What in the hell? You can’t just zap me around like-”

He sees Sam in the corner of his eye, suddenly, he’s being hugged, and a soft, “Bobby,” fills the air.

“You got your soul back, boy,” he realises.

…

In Sitka, Alaska, Charlene Odin lies sleeping, and with a slight smile, Crowley looks down at her.


End file.
